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When my love for you was blind
But I couldn't make you see it
Couldn't make you see it
That I loved you more than you'll ever know
A part of me died when I let you go

sometimes i dun understand myself. .. i juz dunno wad i feel or think anymore. . . i get irritated and agitated so easily now. . . i totally hate where our klas is moving to la. . . so small and cramp!!! can't stand it and somemore takin exam there. . . going to die. . .

i totally love kaili lor. .. she saved me!!! taught me chem when i was dying!!! she is a damn good tutor lor. . . i need to buck up!!! if i go three pure. . . i will be with flo. .. but if i dun. . . i dunno where i am going. . .

p.s i love you ♥
living in my own crazy world

was totally humiliated by tyt la. . . can't stand her. . . today eng did groupwork and then she say pair up with the person behind u. . . so it was lyk me with chers, beatz with fang and lei with no one. . . then tyt go and ask daph to pair with lei cos daph no one behind. . . when i heard tat i juz said wadeva quite loudly i tink. . . jo say it was loud. . . but nvm. . . tyt was lyk hu say tat. . . then the whole klas started luffin and beatz and the rest was lyk saying i was jealous and wanted to be with daph blah blah blah. . . was so embarrassin la. . . lyk i love daph until siao which is not tat true. . not until THAT siao. . . so anyway. . . the grp work for our three pair turned out to be six ppl. . . got sabo by kai and xinhui so had to go out and perform . . it was very lame and funni. . . very fun. . . did alot of sound effects and fang was acting lyk the rude person. . .

my and jo's geo book is full of secrets. . . spent the whole ipw tokin about stuff and writing it down the the geo book with markers before erasing them away. . . lucky wrap up with plastic sheet. . . went to lib to study geo with jo and jia. . . then munx came along. . . stayed until 7 for my dad. . . was so tired. . . going to take a break from studyin. . . gettin a headache liao. .. plus my eye haven realli healed yet so. . . sigh. . . realli miss her la. . .

p.s i love you ♥
living in my own crazy world

juz saw something tat hurt me alot. . . my heart is realli into pieces. . . why did things turn out this way??? what on earth didn i do to make you act tis way??? i dun even noe why u left. . . was it becos of something i did??? things are becoming stranger and i dun lyk it at all. . . i realli dun understand. . . is it your motive to make me feel this way juz to get ur revenge?

i tink tat if i get into nj. . . i will go. . . there is too much things tat hurt me in st nicks liao

p.s i love you ♥
living in my own crazy world

i hate myself alot. . . dunno wad to do. . . cannot absorb anything. . . further more i haf been breaking down lots of times. . . i am so going to die. . . i am so sad tat i didn't even feel happie when i came to school la. . . even when i saw her, i didn't even smile. . .

nearly broke down durin recess again when i talked to flo on the phone. . . flo could tell tat there was something wrong with me, think she heard it from my voice but then my voice was quite normal. . . maths was shit cos the exams was coming and all the new stuff kept coming and coming lyk a bullet train. . . home ec was rubbish. . . full of crap. . . if onli ms gwee had some brains and tat home ec wasn't so shitty. . . my mood would haf been beta. . .

c.lit was lyk a bloody lesson. . . didn't pay any attention to it at all. . . me and beatz was lyk writing fuck all over the paper and beatz were drawing guys with wings with many words of fuck on the background. . . e.lit continued doing the same. . . chinese had a quiz. . . did it with beatz. . . brain was blocked as many words did not noe how to write. . . did chinese compre. . .

after school went to flo's klas. . . found her standing with kai and the rest. . . turns out tat she jabbed her hand until it bled. . . there was quite alot of blood. . . dun noe why she turned sucidal but then it was the pen's fault. . .

life is sometimes not worth the trouble and time. . . sometimes if u cared about wad other ppl think about u, u will not be urself but a hypocrite tat wants ppl to lyk u. . .

p.s i love you ♥
living in my own crazy world

feelin so bloody down and sick. . . lyk any time can cry lyk tat. . . . cannot call jo or daph cos they will be studyin for exams. . . juz feel so bloody spastic and cannot be cheerful anymore. . . going thru a 360 degree turn. . . very moody now. .. juz feel very sad tat durin the hols i will be all alone. . . even flo also going back to hong kong. . . sigh. . . .

going to japan on the 7th of nov. . . tried to push it back cos shu and the rest mayb going back later then haf more time to spend with them but then cannot. . . it is juz fate i guess. . . sigh. . . dun feel lyk going anywhere anymore... and cannot. . . cos going to switzerland and phuket next year. . . dunno why am i going to all these places when i juz wanna stay in spore. . . i am tryin not to break down. . . juz cannot. . . but i am shatterin into pieces very soon . . .

p.s i love you ♥
living in my own crazy world

spent lyk 15 -16 hours at school. . . nv knew that i was so unapathetic. . . normally i would give the whole thing a miss but then jo psycho me into it. . . flo was also on duty. . . was so happie when i saw her lyk. . . screamed damn loud. . . suppose to be doin cip but then spend time blowin up balloons and selling them. . . fang came also. . . was so psych to see her. . . ppl tat went were daph, ivy, qin, jo, shu, siew, jia, fang, mun,mei, fang and audrey. . . got a yellow balloon. . . daph suggested tat i get it since mr ng treated me, fang and mei balloons. . . so lucky!!! tied the balloon to the jar tat daph gave me or else my sis would scream when it floated around in the room. . . was so sweaty and smelly la. . . i didn't noe tat flo knew me so well la. . . i also didn't noe tat i was totally down this past week. . . sigh. . .

my balloon and jo's keep on gettin tangled up. . . was screamin around the whole track with jo and ivy. . . then went to the music room to see whether need to help the old folks. . . shouldn't haf gone there. . . was forced to eat by cai po. . . told her tat i was suppose to help and she said tat not time yet. . . sigh. . . had to drink soup. . . saw lei dancing the family dance. . . then we also went to join. . . so fun. . . going to be sad when i leave st.nixs in sec four. . . stayed there for eight years already. . . . going to osaka in nov. . . tryin to push back it to end of nov. . . cos. . .

thot i saw him at the gatherin tonite but then not very sure. . . cannot see him. . . hope tat it was a case of mistaken identity. . . shocked me lyk shit.

p.s i love you ♥
living in my own crazy world

my right eye looks lyk shit now. . . doc say tat infection and i thot it was becos i cried too hard on fri. . . sigh. . . so long nv cry and once i do. . . i get an eye infection. it hurts lyk hell. . . even when i sneeze. . . all becos of her la. . . make me so upset until i break down. . . now finally noe the reason why liao. . . but also not very sure. . . think tat she affect me about 60%. . . the other 40% is about cca or school la. . . all her fault la, make me cry until my eye got prob. . . still haf to go to school somemore. . . and then see her again. . . feel very upset but now swear nv to cry again. . . no matter where i go. . . i will always see her. . . and somemore she is damn impt to me too, not in a lover way but as a fren. . . sigh. . . dunno wad to do. . . feel lyk screwin up my exams. . . not going for three pure anyway plus dun care whether go which combi. . . sigh .. . got chinese test on tues i tink and i haven even prepared!!! how to prepare when my eye is lyk shit. . .

my cousin said i look lyk i got knocked down by car. . . how consoling. . . plus the medicine is suppose to give me gastric problems. . . thank god i dun haf gastric yet. . . all my hw nv do. . . will do tomorrow la. . . when i can at least see properly. . . now haf blind. . . and look lyk got sting by bee. . .. my cuz damn good at doing card tricks la. . . dunno how he does it but he is very good. . . everytime freak me out. . . somemore haf to see ms gwee tomorrow.. . . stupid video thingy. . .

p.s i love you ♥
living in my own crazy world

totally broke down today. . . in school and at home. . .
eyes are so bloody small and painful. . . sigh. . . dun even noe why i was crying la
i love daph, jo, ivy, beatz and shu
totally cheered me up

daph. . . totally love u lotz. . . should feel honoured tat u were willing to hear me cry for lyk over an hour. . . dun worry, feeling alright now. . .juz didn't noe tat i was being spas. .

jo. . . u are the best. . . always hearin me sprout rubbish and now haf to hear me cry. . . u are a great consultant, made me feel alot beta. . sorrie for being psycho.

ivy. . . . i am lucky tat u were around. . . thanks for everything. . . didn't noe tat i was so good at crying. . . dunno wad to do if u were not around. . . shinichi will be urs.

beatz. . . u realli made me feel good with ur concern. . . i tink i will totally miss u if we are not together next year. . . u are realli a good fren. . . i am fortunate to haf u as my table mate

shuming. . . i noe tat i freaked u totally out. . . luckily u didn't turn away. . . u are realli cute and adorable and tat angelique and ct is lucky to haf u. . . haha

and to all those tat helped me in a way or another. . . thanks. . . love u guys

p.s i love you ♥
living in my own crazy world

my brain is half functioning now. . . in other words i am brain dead.
dunno how come so tired la. . . muz be daph and jo influence me one. . .
from the time i came back from school. . . i slept until now la. . . so going to fail my exams due to my heck care, bo chap, slackin attitude. . .
tomorrow going to the lib to study with jia, kai and jo. die die muz study. . . i swear i will not slack tomorrow and that i will complete all my maths ws before daph. . .
now haf maths, chinese and . . . bio??? worksheets to complete. . . molly is crazy la. . . everytime assume tat we will read her mind and do the ws that she THINKS tat we noe wad is in her mind. . .
was pissed yesterday due to tat bloody macbeth ws la. . . the riddles part. . . the answers are bloody stupid. . . i search the entire net for them la. . . should haf searched earlier, then no need to rely on my -useless- cousin. . . go and say wad pple wishing for the dead la. . . all crappy ans. . . shall not be bothered about him. . .
tryin to see whether can persuade my dad to let me out to the lib tomorrow. . . sigh. . . . haf no energy to debate with him .. .
now hugging daph's present. . . going to sleep again. . . cannot stand it anymore

p.s i love you ♥
living in my own crazy world

listening to my md now. . . trying to find mp3s. . . .
prayin tat i dun crash my com again. . . mum said tat will not help me to fix . feel so yuan wang. the last time was becos of my dad lor. anehow go and fix the plug, until cannot go on to the net.
finish macbeth. . . left chinese ws, maths, and science book review. dunno how to write it but never mind la. juz try. . . crap alot. . . .

now very alone. . . downstairs now very noisy, dad's relatives all downstairs, should go down and say hi but dun wanna. very borin. somemore yesterday got party. dun feel so good. sis pissed cos nv eat breakfast. hu ask her not to wake up early, i prepared my own breakfast liao, ask her if she wants to eat but she did not want. . . sigh... maid on her day off. . . sis complaining tat i nv tell her, dunno why cannot be independent one.

p.s i love you ♥
living in my own crazy world

made a terrible mistake juz now. . . sigh. . . shall not elaborate on it. doing macbeth now. find it very interesting somehow. dunno why. . .

i love daphnetehmingyee to bits. . . fine. . . . didn't noe how come i made tat mistake. . . sigh. dunno whether to wrap up daph's present onot

p.s i love you ♥
living in my own crazy world

i totally love my mum. she fixed my com!!! feelin very sorrie for myself cos everytime i am the one to crash the com. . . haha. my mum totally rocks. she didn't even ask for her $200 back unlike my dad. sheez. . . e diff between two parents. i haven done my e.lit yet, my sc review plus my chinese. . . going to die. . . daph and beatz will kill me.

went to darlin kai's house to do home ec on thurs and fri. . . her house lyk have all the cooking things la. . . finish home ec liao. . . so proud of ourselves, even though the food was erm. . . . . . . . sort of inedible. sigh. . .

daph is so mean!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! i tink i will give her yellow pencil case to my beloved

p.s i love you ♥
living in my own crazy world

this blog is rotting. . . heck care la
got home ec project to do. . . nvm, going to finish anyway. going to kai's house on thurs and fri. . .
going out wif mi sis tomorrow. dunno go where, also dunno whether she can wake up onot first.
muz study liao. . . results dropping lyk eggs.

p.s i love you ♥
living in my own crazy world