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When my love for you was blind
But I couldn't make you see it
Couldn't make you see it
That I loved you more than you'll ever know
A part of me died when I let you go

on the side note, i hope you lose him. yup.
only then will you realise, how bloody fked up you are.

p.s i love you ♥
living in my own crazy world

first things first, I PASSED MY BASIC THEORY TEST. ha.

was busy these few days with like visiting and like work and alot of other stuff that would be too long and complicated if i typed. yuppp.

anyway, yest went to school and was kind of dreading teaching cause 1C gave me such a headache for the past two days even though they were my favourite class. scolded them like on wed and thurs. gah. super noisy class.

anyway, had to buy sweets and stuff from 711 on the way to school since i promised 1F. haha. the lesson was fun cause they were such a guai class. then break and was sitting with joli, siewmin and audrey in the canteen.

was reading the basic theory book and MISS ANG, kept cursing me to fail. ahhh. was stress. after that went into 1C to like have lesson. and gosh, they were super guai today. ha. won't be teaching pri 1 anymore starting from next week. will miss them though. ahh. contradicting.

after tat head down to sdcc to meet jiin for driving. haha. test test. was quite nervous. but passed which made me happy.

then head down to orchard to meet niklas for lunch and stuff. ended up in fish and co fish and co. i got bullied by jiin and niklas. T.T haha. cheese. i like cheese. so we walked around paragon then cause i had the swensen voucher, we walked down to plaza sing to like eat swensen.

ordered the two sundaes then jiin psed us to go for dental. ah. ahh. realised that i keep going out with ppl recently that dun like cherries. daph was one. now like niklas and jiin are another. was sitting there chatting and stuff. ah. future is scary.

then jiin and her bro came to join us so we walked around ps. had this otaku house. haha. and all the pretty guns and swords. haha. then accompanied jiin and her bro to makan and burger king. out of 4, only two ate and the other two were decorations. haha.

after that, i headed down to clarke quay to meet boon jin, joson and usarin. whee. i so long never see joson chua jie fan alr! haha. we went to fisherman's wharf to eat. didn't eat much cause i was so full. after that, walked around clarke quay. was at fullerton hotel when mr tan suddenly wanted to cam whore with lanterns.

took quite alot of pics then wandered around then decided on the spot to play bridge. whee. i hearts card games. was playing some indian poker i tink. then pig game. JOSON CHUA IS LIKE LEVEL 7 PIG. and boon jin is DUMB. god. from level 0 to level 4. usarin and i were girl power XDD

i sort of miss school and hanging out with them. got to see them like everyday for the past two years. now is like once a week or even lesser. haha. may have outing again next week XDDD

need to upload pics and do alot of stuff.

went temple today. cause goat fan tai shui. animals that fan tai shui are like ox, goat, dragon and dog. snake i dunno wad. and horse is like fan tao hua. super funny.

super happy yest and today it just spilled over.

was watching nadal. LIKE HEARTS. HIM.

AH. australia open another federer and nadal final. can't wait. super funny.

my mum was telling me something funny yest that happen during like the fam dinner when i was not around. like my dad invited his relatives over. so like my irritating 8 year old cousin was looking at the fridge magnets in my house and saw something and was like asking my sis who the guy next to me was. and my sis was like 'her bf' and my cousin was like 'he is NOT CHINESE! he is like malay or philipino.' and my mum was like ' no, he is spanish'.

so my cousin was damn kpo and big mouth, went to tell all the other relatives had i had a bf which is spanish. my mum didn't know until later during dinner. my aunt was like asking her 'does sueanne have a bf?' then my mum was like 'no?'

then my aunt was like 'but girl girl say that she has a bf that is spanish.' then all the other relatives was like 'ya ya, very worried leh.' then my mum showed them the magnet and they all burst out laughing.

ha. it was my birthday present like 2 years ago from shuxiang and it was like mine and nadal's pic? DUH. of course i want him. good looking and pro.

and ya, he can make my heart skip a beat. HAHA. no, i am completely joking. shall like go scour newspapers for his news.

shall spam pics of nadal soon. and yes, blond is the new thing.

p.s i love you ♥
living in my own crazy world

i realised something.

once a week is not enough. not enough at all.

i really wonder when will it just end.

p.s i love you ♥
living in my own crazy world

as long as i am still living, you bloody deserve whatever you get.

and fyi, if i had slapped you that day, you deserved it. and guess what, i am the most suitable person to give it. because, no one knows what fking clear what had happened.

you are not deserving of whatever people give you. you know why? you take advantage. you think you are in the right. you think that you are so goddamn 'pitiful' because no one loves you. well, no one has gotten anything good out of loving you anyway.

and you disgust me more than ever.

p.s i love you ♥
living in my own crazy world

happy cny.

been quite busy these few days to blog about stuff. cny is like. . . i dunno. dun really like it. guess i am not chinese enuff. like shake hands and stuff. hais.

i have no idea if i am looking forward to wed. cause have to go work. tbh, i quite enjoy it. the kids are cute. haha. and the people i work with such as siewmin, audrey and joli are super fun and nice.

got driving test on fri. die. good luck.

and i have been enjoying myself too much these few days to miss anyone. distractions are always good. but no, i am not looking for a rebound.

and maybe, i have been playing with fire too much.

p.s i love you ♥
living in my own crazy world

maybe i just can't believe how hypocritical people are being.

ya, and i nearly choked at the word trust too.

p.s i love you ♥
living in my own crazy world

just had an exhausting day in school today. like 1 1/2 hour with one faith and one hour with one charity. just spamming work for them to do and teaching them things. tomorrow is like 2 hour with one faith and 1 1/2 hour with one charity. i seriously hope that THERE IS WORK for them to do. or at least i can like come up with stuff to crap english for like 3 1/2 hours.

jiin dropped by school today. ha. she dropped by when i was with 1 charity then after i finished my work and we went around looking for pri sch teachers. ha. technically i see them like almost everyday. was sitting down with mrs chee and talking. ah. super fun. haha. just gossiping about stuff. and seriously, TEACHERS GOSSIP ABOUT STUDENTS.

after that, jiin and i went amk hub for shopping. haha. didn't buy anything except like earrings. didn't find clothes that i like. ah.

tomorrow my dad is coming back and i can't wait. don't know if i going for the driving trial test tml. and my class dinner. hais.

and you can still blog after everything has happened and pretend things are normal? wow, i salute you.

and facebook is disgusting when you can read what other ppl post to others. it is like invasion of privacy and what i read, i dun want to know. i am fine with it alr. accepted. ya, some people gain stuff, some people lose. you just gained what i lost.

p.s i love you ♥
living in my own crazy world

happy 19th birthday! hearts. ok, i know you say that it makes me sound ah lian. thanks for being my friend and always there for like the past 5 -6 years. it has been a long time since we have known each other.

thanks esp for all the advice you have given. hee. my incredible donkey! super happy that i can see you everyday during work. hee. sec sch jc, work place. if uni is the same, IT IS FATE XD

------

my feet hurt like mad. the punishment of wearing heels to school and WHAT FOR? gah.

suddenly teaching pri 1 english for the entire week. screwed. like timetable is packed and pri 1 are super hyper and i just want to whack them. like bish bish.

quite tiring. asking them to shut up and listen to you. gah. but got this girl in my pri 1 charity class which is super pretty and sweet. and no, i am not a paedophile. ha.

GAH. teaching them hand writing is like. . . can die. got quite annoyed when they didn't want to read the book. but end up, showing that you are pissed works. haha. they are super sweet though.

two classes EVERYDAY. can mass murder me. even the class that i was relief teaching was a primary 1 class. can just kill me. and no use wearing heels cause the primary 1s are super short.

was like praying for 2pm to arrive.tml is another day. AGAIN. and AGAIN. imagine repeating the same things to two classes. hais.

lucky school ended then went to look for daphne XDDD haha. i keep going to sec block staff room although i am like in the primary section. after that, we took bus to j8 to have swensen. was hungry. hee.

free ice cream. lol. SUPER FUNNY. cause i ordered baked rice and the person asked if we were students. and i was like YES. then daph had to show her ezlink card. ha. by right, we are teachers. XD but nvm. cheaper by like abit also can.

haha. then spam photos. after that, walked around j8 looking for stuff and stuff. went popular. then went cotton on, i bought a shirt. hee.

was telling daph about the j8 pervert that niklas was telling me yest. it is like, can google him.haha. but he only preys on guys so girls don't worry.

shall not tink about how tomorrow i am going to present lesson. ah. haha. i alr know what i want to do with pri 1 faith. it is 1 charity that i can murder for tinking i am like their mother. rawr.

whee.happy. later going driving school with jiin for lessons. if she ps, SHE DIES. according to her blog. ha.

p.s i love you ♥
living in my own crazy world

daphne hearts me. SO LIANNNN.

high on sugar now now. currently with daph teh in my room. it is after school for both of us. hee. whee. can meet her like everyday everyday. thank god pri side and sec side are very near to each other.

I DUN HAVE TO TEACH CHINESE. they found a relief teacher like YES YES. thank god. i think they doubt my ability. haha.

had a pri 2 and 1 class today. super cute. esp the primary 1 class. ha. the primary 5 class hates me. i don't blame them. ha. cause it was the first time i walked into a class with a damn qian bian face. ha. cause i heard rumours from my colleagues that that class had a very mean girl and called my colleague a 'stupid bitch'. so i went there prepared to make sure that they dun bully me. ah. was like tan shu wei mrs tian that kind of fierce. literally, bitch from hell.

then after school waited for daph so wait at family lounge and got ambushed by my pri 4 and 2 class. they super cute. haha. cute.

shall look forward to tml. XDDD

and OMG. i just realised that i didn't take photo with ben gan! ah. my angel!!!! gosh. gahhh. i shall take daph's photo and crop.

p.s i love you ♥
living in my own crazy world

SUE ANNE TEO FORCED ME TO BLOG!

haha this is daphne at her house now. :D
and she wanted me to say that i love her.
...

p.s i love you ♥
living in my own crazy world

now rushing out my lesson plan for tomorrow. god. chinese teacher. i just feel like laughing. and my pronounciation is probably fail for chinese oral now. need all the luck i can have. tomorrow will determine if the rest of the week will go smoothly or it just will suck.

i should get paid more. probably going to OT due to the large amount of work i need to mark and need to return all by tues. so that i can throw them more hw. MUAHAHA. no, shall not be influenced by niklas who thinks kids are there to be bullied.

preparing pri 3 lessons now. 3 chaps in advance. hopefully can finish all i need to teach by tml. gah. if they dun listen, they can jolly well stand thruout my entire lesson. yup.

gah. still have pri 4 lessons to plan. dun need slp early alr. gah.

p.s i love you ♥
living in my own crazy world

happy birthday babe! thanks for being my friend for 9 years. always listening to me rant and stuff. enjoyed spending time with you in hk and all those late late nights we wandered around and getting lost.

thanks for teaching me new stuff like baking and cycling. hearts you load. one of the stable people in my life.

appreciate having you in my life loads and ah, i suck at expressing myself but i think you get the meaning XD

p.s i love you ♥
living in my own crazy world

the disgust is just building up. it is not receding at all.

i can't stand to see your face.

dun fucking complain that no one loves you. do you even deserve their love, their fucking trust? you live in your bloody self absorbed world, dun even think about the people around you. you know what is the best? you start accusing ppl with phrases that suits urself.

you can bitch about other people. about how immoral they are. about what SLUTS they are. i am sorry. shouldn't the finger be pointing at yourself. what a hypocrite you are.

i dun buy the bull that people are young. they dun know what they are thinking. wow. i mean you can do this kind of stuff and REGRET? you are either very stupid or acting blur.

if you are feeling extremely sorry for yourself, you have sunk lower in my opinion. no wait, that isn't possible at all. cause you are no worse than a fking ****.

before you start talking and gossiping about others, pls think. saying sorry doesn't help anything. not in this case. not ever.

i am just laughing at what a hypocrite you are.

and i am ashamed to even know you.

and for the other person, you dun deserve whatever hospitality people has given you. giving that innocent look. pretend to act blur. guess what, the show is over. you are just a bastard.

in case anyone thinks i am speaking in the fit of anger. i am not. i have thought this thru. and this is exactly what i feel.

there is no love. just plain disgust.

p.s i love you ♥
living in my own crazy world

i wanted to blog about my day. about how it went.

all i can say now is that i am fucking disgusted. i am super disappointed. i am ashamed. i don't ever want to see both your faces ever again. do you understand?

i never want to talk, look or fucking even catch of glimpse of both of you.

is this how you treat people who trust you? DO YOU FUCKING THINK THAT BOTH OF YOU ARE SO MATURE?

oh yes, i am totally fucking over-reacting this time. blame me then. i don't care. you guys probably think that the people around you are all fools. like stopping you guys etc. probably cursing us in your minds. i would really like to see how it ends. then i can fucking laugh.

congrats, you totally betrayed my trust. good for you if you think i am a fucking fool. enjoy it while it lasts cause i won't ever be a fool to both of you again.

i am feeling so sick that i want to throw up. yes. i can't even stand seeing your faces now.

2009. the first fucking time of my 19 years life i have ever been so pissed, ashamed, disappointed as well as betrayed. thank you both, you gave me a memory of a lifetime.

p.s i love you ♥
living in my own crazy world

everyone can start laughing now.

i may have to teach chinese for a week to pri 3 and 4 kids. and it was the classes that i took before. ah. i myself find it hilarious. HOW AM I SUPPOSE TO TEACH CHINESE?! AH.

today is a packed day. half an hour more for my first lesson and then after that half an hour break and have 2 1/2 lessons with 3g which i am not looking forward to as the class is rather. . . god.

i can just start laughing.

later finding daph at 12.30. looking forward to that. ah. teach chinese. GOD. daph was like 'i hope you dun dui wang jian de lian'. ah.

printed stuff for pri 3 kids to do. 2 1/2 hour with them. not looking forward at all. hais.

p.s i love you ♥
living in my own crazy world

back from hong kong! shall post about it later when i feel like it. now super tired. ah.

and the trip cost like 1.2 K? due to my obsession with bag buying. i bought like 3 bags. yes. and alot of other stuff and funny things. i bought back an ENTIRE GOOSE. yummy.

and on the side note, i love my besties to death. haha. hk was FUN. spending time with my besties was even nicer XD

p.s i love you ♥
living in my own crazy world

today we were such pigs. daph mei and i woke up at like 11 plus am. haha. slept until so nice. whee.

it is seriously fun to have frens slp over. can just talk. daph slept at 1 plus while mei and i just slept at 3 plus. we were just talking. it is nice just to get some things off your chest. the future is just so uncertain.

then we went to eat lunch / breakfast at prata place at thomson with my sis and elvin. super funny. the person taking our order was this weird but sociable person. ha. total order was like 6 egg, 3 cheese, 2 plain, 1 mushroom cheese, 4 ice milo, 1 milo dinosaur, 1 mutton curry. alot alot. ha.

after that, daph went home so the rest went back to the house. mei was just dancing ddr away. haha. i was packing my stuff for hk. ah.

after that, packed and packed and packed. then was slightly late for the dinner with boon jin, usarin and yiwen. haha.

i had to cab there cause i was still at home at the meeting time and i received a threatening 'i'll kill you' msg. yup.

went to manhatten fish market. hee. shared a fish platter with yiwenwen. damn cool. it is nicer than fish and co somemore. haha. we sat there until 9 plus. talking and laughing. felt super happy. super long never see them somemore esp usarin. hearts.

after that, walked around clarke quay. super fascinated with the swing thing and the reverse bungee there. sat there just looking at it. after that ate hokkaido ice cream. haha. tiramisu and green tea. ahah. super nice combi.

after that sat there playing bridge. super long never play. the night scene was lovely. the moon was round.

thanks boon jin, usarin and yiwen for the dinner and present. felt happy that i could meet them before i left for hk. will miss them. yup.

this birthday didn't turn out so badly. it had a nice ending. and i have daph, mei, zoe, elvin, boon jin, usarin and yiwen to thank. love you guys loads. thanks for making me happy and it is a better start to 2009 already.

will be away from 12 - 15 jan. in hk with my besties. lucky going on work days so i dun have to work that much and i can meet my frens in the weekend.

p.s i love you ♥
living in my own crazy world

totally thank daph and mei for like celebrating my birthday with me and making it special and something i would have remembered.

it would have ended as the unhappiest birthday i had ever had but somehow, things got better as both of them are sleeping over at my house. hee. had fun today.

thanks to my sis and elvin for celebrating with me as well. yup.

haha. daph came super early in the morn like around 10-11. then we sat and talked and after that went lunch with my mum and sis at soup restaurant. the food today was nice. walked around and then went back to my house.

played daidee with my sis and elvin while waiting for ms ong to arrive. haha. took bus down to j8. went swensen. free ice cream. hee. i got a balloon. happy. thanks mei! hee. my first balloon

haha. after that went my room to play ddr. ha. daph was super funny. yup. now just talking to mei. had cake cutting session just now. happy.

i feel so happy that i have such frens with me to make this day special.

thanks. i love you guys

p.s i love you ♥
living in my own crazy world

maybe my birthday wish should be that i would be happy this 2009.

cause right now, i am feeling anything but happy.

thank you for once again ruining my birthday. you seem to do that perfectly every year. congrats.

p.s i love you ♥
living in my own crazy world

thanks to ppl who wished me like jiin, niklas, boon jin, deng, brendan, rach, jamie etc like on the dot or around there. haha.

and it was super anti climax that when the clock striked 12 midnight, my entire internet connection was lost and ended up with jiin going ARE YOU THERE? ha.

hearts. and the midnight call from my dad was lovely.

haha. and also to, audrey dudu and joson! cellobass! =D and also too lee yi and shuxiang!!!

and i love my bestie! haha. oddly enuff. i think she counted down.


oddly enough the first person who wished me like really on my birthday was the last person i expected.

p.s i love you ♥
living in my own crazy world

i fulfilled my own wish. I KNOW HOW TO CYCLE. like thank god. right before i turn 19. totally. yes.

except that, my leg is damn ugly now. my left is filled with bruises, cuts, skin coming off from all the impromptu stopping. i cycled into a tree and some uncle riding pass was like 'zhuang da shu ah?' damn malu. yes.

was with my sis and elvin. walked from my house to bishan park and i didn't know it was damn freaking far. went there and the uncle was like need ic and stuff. we didn't bring anything except money so elvin had to rent the bike to cycle back to get stuff. it took me half an hour to control the bike. i was like going on to grass.

but finally, could SUDDENLY control it and could turn all the bends and stuff and could cycle pass dogs without crashing to trees. happy. after that went play ground. ah. i love swings. super happy that i could play on it again.

today i woke up super slpy. no idea why. had. i was running out of clothes to wear cause i didn't want to be a super formal teacher so it is like smart casual. it was dress down day so could wear jeans. whee.

first time had lesson at 7.45. joli didn't know she was suppose to come so i took over her slot and i took the first half of the day's lessons. whee. the pri 4 girls are damn sweet and stuff. they were like 'can you be our form teacher?' it is super cute. the pri 3 class i nearly killed one girl. ah.

it is funny like you know we were talking amongst the relief teachers and we were like this girl damn naughty and stuff and this class this and that. it really made me feel like a teacher and those were really my students.

walking down to canteen can get greetings from the children and it really makes me feel happy cause like they are all smiling and stuff. haha. although they calling me 'miss teo' makes me sound super old. ha.

was looking at uni apps online during my free time. brought my laptop down to staff room. i decided what i wanted. what course i am taking. where i intend to try out for. it is not spore though. lucky had shu xian there to give me advice and stuff. haha.

went down to my cousin's class to pick her up for lunch. ah. she shouted my name across the class. ha. her classmates were like HI MISS TEO. feeling damn old.

after that my uncle fetched me home. super slpy now. feel like sleeping.

p.s i love you ♥
living in my own crazy world

i am just feeling super duper unhappy now. super . and i don't know why.

the feeling of being helpless totally sucks.

the dateline is tml.

p.s i love you ♥
living in my own crazy world

now i know what it is like to be totally forgotten.

shall just focus on uni application. hopefully can apply for australia. can ask lee yi for advice. thank god she called me or i would just still ignore uni stuff.

p.s i love you ♥
living in my own crazy world

back from work. like YES. two days down and earned like 130. 100 plus if take into consideration cpf.

today was a damn slack day. went to school at 7.15 and shu xian and i checked the timetable. damn slack. sx had like one hour of pri 5 class at 12.30 and mine was like half an hour of pri 2 class at like 1.00.

in other words, from 7.15 - 1.00pm. i had no class. i was extremely free. and it was tiring. i was just reading my basic theory book and listening to ipod. and watching anime on my ipod. tml, bring laptop. YES.

ha. siew min super smart to bring her laptop.although can use the school one but like not very nice cause it is quite open and obvious. hais.

so was like walking around with sx and sm. went to the pri lib and it was horridly pathetic. i miss the old lib. then went lunch. ha. saw like vienna who was my sis's classmate and xinyi my cca junior last time. then saw naiying and yang yang also my cca junior. ha. they all shocked that i was working. tsk.

sat there with naiying and yang yang just talking. haha. after that, went for my 1pm class.

stepped in, haven even write my name on board, got someone shout 'JIE JIE!' damn malu. my cousin's class. stelle-anne. ha. like after they greated me and stuff, she ran up to hug me like MAD. ah. malu.

quite fun her class i tink. i had to do admin work which was to find out who were catholics. ha. i could like identify potential bitches in the class. in pri 2. thank god it was onli half an hour.

then my cousin asked me to go lunch with her. end up her following me to staff room and general office where i had to settle my staff. after that went to find my uncle and sat down and watch her eat lunch. then my uncle send me home. it was super near but end up, still got fetched home. ah.

hope tomorrow will be equally slacked. haven touched other levels yet.

it is mortifying when your cousin say damn loudly in her class that what you wear today was 'very sexy'. stares. and fyi, it was like my MOST conservative outfit. brown shirt and knee length skirt. i feel like some kind of geek.

finally settled the hk hotel thing and the flight staff that jiin asked me to do. ah. my noons are so free. i wonder if i shld like get a part time job after school. hee.

and hope hope that meiling will be teaching pri relief. ha. had to ask stuff for her but hopefully i have companion cos shu xian ending next thurs.

my blog music is emoish. i dunno why. listening to it makes me feel sad. . .

p.s i love you ♥
living in my own crazy world

lol. was watching kaikan phrase all along. anime anime. this working hours are so. . . i dunno early?

feel like finding a part time job after the work. ah. dunno.

if i wasn't reminded, i would have forgotten my chinese birthday which falls on this fri. ah. earlier than my english birthday this year. 21 years old on chinese birthday. WTH. damn old. grrr.

p.s i love you ♥
living in my own crazy world

ok. first day of work was. . . boring? and i already decided on something which i shall reveal like towards the end of this post.

6.20 - woke up and dressed.
7.10 - left the house and started walking
7.15 - reached school
7.20 - saw timetable
8.30 - reliefed a primary 2 class.
9.00- break
9.30 - reliefed a primary 3 class.
10.00 - break.
12.30 - suppose to relief a primary 5 class but didn't need in the end.
12.30 - officially nothing to do.
1.30 - went home.

yes. it is horridly boring. like bleh. saw the time table and i was like, have 3 half an hour slots which i have to take over and stuff. like baby sitting. yes. first class, i was already bullied. was playing with them hang man. and yes, got asked if i was married and other type of funny qn. ah. then had a half hour break then reliefed another class.

was slacking around and went down to have dou nai with shu xian and siew min. haha. they also relief teachers. just knew shu xian today like i was sitting in general office waiting and end up like she started talking to me. then siew min knew her since pri 4.

so like lunch also went tgt and stuff but their time tables also quite diff. sm was doing pe reliefing. then most of the time was just shu xian and i stoning. bleh.

super happy when my last class didn't need me at all. bleh. i am horridly unused when people call me like ms teo or teacher. just feel so bloody old.

saw mrs brenda tan which is like hearts. met my pri 6 form teacher. then also had like other sec teachers. i more familiar with the sec teachers than pri cause so many left. mrs angie choong was stil there.

then saw mrs sng. ha. she was super happy to see me and i was not kidding. whee. my cca teacher plus my sec 4 english teacher. yup.

my feet were dying. i need to come up with another outfit for tml which is like formal. bleh.

and one conclusion. i am never going to have kids. if they are super noisy and stuff. really, today i was like, i want to kill them and dip them in oil and fry. ah. i was actually ok with kids. but a class of 40 plus noisy kids, i am ready to kill someone. no, no kids for me. seriously. then the pri 6 also damn childish kind. talk alot and noisy.

and because you are a relief teacher, they dun really give a damn about you unless you are freaking fierce. yes. grrrr. tml going to scream at someone.

tml again. damn early. but end like 1.30. it is early. morning hours and then, 65 dollars per day. ah. sweet. considering that if discount my slacking hours and just count the hours which i really go relief, it is only one hour. one hour 65 bucks. plus, my transport fee is free. ha. walk walk. hence, my feet hurt like hell now. stupid platforms.

my mum and aunt called. i was complaining about one person. bleh. cannot tahan kpo ppl in office places. seriously. and that lady was the one settling my admin stuff. feel like killing her. ask so much qn.

shall go slp now. slept like 1am around there and kept waking up. rawr. restless night.

and thinking about what had happened so far, really made me annoyed. i mean, wtf. yes. now, just heck. follow the lead. the delete button is just so freaking convenient for some.

p.s i love you ♥
living in my own crazy world

i am feeling totally weird. in like 7 hours plus i will be in a working environment. relief teaching. hopefully i don't kill anyone. hopefully i don't burst out laughing. hopefully i don't start playing with the small kids and totally forget about what i was suppose to do.

ah. my pri sch teacher was the one who called me. taught flo, rach, jiin and i science in pri 6? i not very sure. gosh. i can't rmb. but it is cool. going to see all my previous pri 6 teachers. pls dun put me with like the teachers i don't like.

ah. must rmb my account book. even if forget, i can just take a five min walk home and stuff. the benefits of staying super close to the school. but it also means that, i cannot b late. ah.

working outfit. shit. i need working clothes. rawr. i will probably be in like shirt 75 percent of the time. gah. this sucks. shoes. no slippers. so like no jeans. shit. heels? i don't know. gosh.

but the canteen food shld b good. whee. orange bowl but the, you know, eating it alone sucks. thank god i get released early. like very early. ah. but tml i not sure. pls dun let me b bored tml.

and the lack of concession is eating up my money like crazy. i spent like. . . i tink 5 bucks today? shit. i don't like it at all.

ah. four more days. i have no idea why am i not looking forward to it at all. . .

there is no privacy in msn at all. it is too easy to find out who blocked or deleted you. tsk. the fun is all taken out alr.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4Kp2F0PmVk4

p.s i love you ♥
living in my own crazy world

once again, happy birthday florry! hearts bestie.

woke up super early today like 9am. was like using the lappy and stuff. then suddenly jiin msged me to ask if i wanted to meet up and stuff. haha. so i go company today since wadeva plans i had before were screwed.

got dressed and met jiin on 169 bus. took mrt down to raffles place then jiin had a phone call saying she had an interview there as well. went there, recruit express, lol. jiin just joined in and just filled up forms stating wad we wanted and stuff. took like less than 10 minutes.

after that, went to have lunch at macs. whee. sat there and talk and i felt so much better after that. then we went to find out where hitachi building was and we got lost. i ended up calling my mum down to meet us cause she also worked as hitachi towers. then mummy showed us the way.

end up, jiin's interview was cancelled so we ended up heading down to her house cause i wanted to learn how to cycle. i was super stubborn about it. sorry babe! changed into the extra clothes i brought and we were like walking around. jiin was asking like most of the houses that had bikes outside if we could borrow.

end up walking to the playground and there was this group of guys there. due to jiin's charismatic nature, we got the bike. haha. in the beginning, i could onli sway one side. but then jiin manage to like teach me and stuff. could cycle some distances. need to learn how to turn and stuff. have photos! whee. i am so proud of myself. ha.

it was super funny cause like there was this indian uncle that was taking a walk and he was like saying 'don't scared and don't care about other people around. look in front' so i listened to him and i could do it. super happy.

after that, went back jiin's house to rest a while and then went home around 7.30. ah.

tml is st nicks job. i quite excited. working for the next three days then i fly off to hk like on mon. will continue st nicks job when i am back. happy. haha. need to rmb to bring stuff. tml tml. hopefully, i dun have much stuff to do.

martina called me today! ended up talking to her about alot of stuff. i miss her although she stays like right down the lane from me.

and mei and daph. ah. cycle. shit. i really want to learn before sat. it is kind of like something i want to do.

p.s i love you ♥
living in my own crazy world

p.s i love you ♥
living in my own crazy world

i love you alot alot and i don't know how to express it. 9 years of frenship is super long. i really really miss you like hell alot now.

i really would like to thank you for the times you have been there for me. i am really really sorry if i spoiled anything for you. i am really an undeserving friend.

i respect whatever decision you makes and support you. i really really want you to be happy and i really hope that you can attain the happiness that you have always wanted.

thanks for being my pillar at all times and i really hope that i can do the same. i really love you like hell lot. i know i shouldn't worry for you and that you are strong enough. really miss you.

i would like to thank both flo and jiin for being by my side all these while. i really don't deserve both of them at all.

- - -
btw, go ignore all you want. dao. that is what you do best. i am just tired of getting blamed by you. by your own insecurities. by you insisting that i had told her something. well, i didn't. yes, the damage is done. but now, i don't know by who. maybe by me. then i apologise for that. but now, i don't see how it matters. start blaming and pointing fingers. there is nothing more you can do.

it doesn't pay to be the middle man. when you want to back out. you get killed.

p.s i love you ♥
living in my own crazy world

Mei Ling has says:
cause the other two are so not your taste

ah. ms ong knows me well. totally well. hee. these few nights have been talking to her and i am feeling happy and stuff. i mean hanging out with close frens in st nicks would make anyone happy. it is a kind of bond that no one can explain i guess.

woke up at like 1pm today. super late. cause last night stupid bloody kx impromptu ask me go yumcha at like 10 plus pm. met him at like 11.20pm so went amk there to eat. carrot cake! whee. got free food. haha. sat down to chat and stuff.

then i wanted to sit swing swing so walked to the playground at the drive thru macs. ate ice cream on the way. mcdonalds is super . . . increase price like mad. now 70 cents. wad ever happened to the 25 cents ice cream?!

went there and swing swing. super nice. the air damn cooling. super relaxing. got stars! then sat there talking and wanting to murder him cause he kept kicking sand at me. grrrr. sat there until like 1.30am then he took cab back and mum fetched me.

hence the late wake up. was doing everything today. reading manga. reading book. watching kaikan phrase on youtube. chatting. everything but touching my driving book. totally screwed. in about 10 hours and 30 min. i have a trial test on theory. die. but seeing that i nv attend any classes, it shld b like understandable if i answer everything wrongly.

ah. thinking and thinking is tiring. remove brain. and i blame kx for all the craziness i shown and all the thinking i did. yes.

p.s i love you ♥
living in my own crazy world

this is a damn old song that i heard when i was like 2 years old. super meaningful.

p.s i love you ♥
living in my own crazy world

whee whee. sueanne is a happy girl.

woke up like 11 something and went downstairs to prepare lunch. was plucking out feathers from the bird's nest my mum bought. lousy bird's nest. so many bloody feathers. grrr.

then cooked baked macaroni. whee. took like 30 min to cook and stuff but it is nice. ivy cooked TOO MUCH MACARONI. so i ended up with like a huge huge tray of food. ah. dinner is that alr. damn sad.

wonder if i shld like bake butter cake. my mum keeps asking me to bake it for dunno wad reason since like no one will really eat. grrr. my butter cookies is like in low supply. shall bake like tml if i happy. and shit, i haven read my driving book yet. die.

happy rolling. i guess ppl will b happy if they dun think so much.

and GOOD LUCK TO MS ONG on her job on mon. lol. horrible girl. SHE DITCHED ME and still ask me to like ditch my jc frens. GOSH.

p.s i love you ♥
living in my own crazy world

ended my phone call with ms ong. ah. missing her already. one hour and a half. damn fun. she super sarca to me. damn sarca but super fun. talked about job stuff. whee. we are like job search ppl tgt cause she also got the st nicks stuff to do. phone call.

lol. thank god i am like html knowledgable and stuff. looks nice on resumes.

watched ponyo on the cliff by the sea today with my aunt. lol. i was actually super lazy to get out of my house cause had to change and stuff but she persuaded me. so went to meet her. ate at ichiban sushi. not bad i guess.

walked around walked around then like went into cinema. lol. i envy the childlike innocence of the movie. like 5 year old kids can just say they like each other. innocent. not bad. the drawings were nice. ponyo is damn cute as a fish. yes. it just made you think how nice if life was so sweet and simple.

from my post before, i guess that is what i want. night time with stars and sparklers at quiet places. just hang out with close friends. sit down and talk. don't really need to bother about where and when.

after the phone call with meiling, i realise that st nicks people have more things in common. they rather sit down and talk. don't really like to walk around aimlessly. hate to stand at one place and wonder which place to go next. the bottom line is that, you are with people you like, why bother about the place? just hang out sit down and talk. there is really no need to plan what to do. no need for fancy places and big big names.

i like that much better. hence, had more fun with bestie than anything else. still thinking about the starry night on 31 dec/ 1 jan.

life is simple really. why think so much? shall listen to mei. she say i think alot.

and i had this damn scary dream last night. instead of it being scary, i just felt lost. i remember crying in my dream. i rmb just feeling hurt. disbelief. dreams don't come true right? there are only two ppl i told bout this dream, jiin and miss ong. yes, i think too much. but it scared me.

p.s i love you ♥
living in my own crazy world

ahhh. vampire knight guilty has ended. i feel sad. LIKE WHY WHY ZERO NV END UP WITH HER? bleh. the manga is so much nicer than the anime though.

shall go type out my resume now. haha. it sounds damn funny.

p.s i love you ♥
living in my own crazy world

i know what i want right now. i want peace and serenity.

i want the sky to be filled with loads of stars. a quiet place with slides and swings and loads and loads of sparklers and candles. lying on the grass star gazing until the sun comes out.

away from the crowd and away from noise. just an open space.

p.s i love you ♥
living in my own crazy world

i realised like this holiday alone, i have taken like over 500 photos. like so many outings with class people, jc frens, besties, sec friends and stuff and i keep bringing my camera along. whee.

was watching tv. went dinner with my sis and elvin to j8 hk restaurant. the baked rice was over expected. in other words, pasta mania's one nicer. yes. haha.

shall go back to doing things. i need need something to do. not sewing though.

p.s i love you ♥
living in my own crazy world

p.s i love you ♥
living in my own crazy world

pictures from yesterday! i get very happy when i see sparklers.




t


today went to my aunt's house. super sleepy due to sleeping at like 3am yest and waking up at like 11am. sleepy. sleepy also due to the wine i drank and the sparkling juice. ah. i need to slp soon.

i still have like pics of previous outings that i haven post up yet. too lazy. tralala.

p.s i love you ♥
living in my own crazy world

ok. it is like close to 2am. reached home like twenty minutes ago and i am quite shagged. had a super fun and memorable new year countdown with babe. yup. this officially beats anything i had done in a long time that was remotely fun. sorry. but it was really sweet and nice to just hang out.

so quick blog before i forget.

woke up this morn to wash my hair and like read manga. lol. then went down to like amk hub to meet jiin and SHE WAS LATE. first time SHE WAS LATE. i get immense pleasure from saying this cause she is almost close to never late.

was reading my basic driving theory book. yes yes. it is sad. i hadly touched it. it is a sad neglected book. anyway, she reached and we took bus down to bishan. lol. she went to sony to collect her camera and we went to ntuc to look for sparklers. lol. didn't sell. so went to buy tako and eat while she went to guardian look for plasters. she is a worser klutz than me.

after that, walked around the bishan area looking for sparklers. satisfied her cravings for bubble tea and nearly caused me to like have high blood sugar or something cause it was sweet. managed to find the sparklers and greedy me like went to buy like two packets which total had like 72 sticks of sparklers.

then went back to amk to take 169 to her house. by the time reach, was already 4 so went to her room to slack. haha. was looking at hk stuff and writing down our itinery. i will try not to shop so much cause not much moolah and i get tired and jiin will probably kill me.

was sitting there talking until like dinner time at 7. haha. had dinner with her bro and jiin. whee. then went to use her com. super funny. i sign in my msn and like she was also using my msn to chat. tsk tsk.

went to bathe and lucky she loaned me her clothes. hwa chong pe shirt and fbts. haha. imposter. lol. felt better after bathing. then went to cam whore with her laptop webcab. i was super fascinated with it. haha. shall post pics tml. whee.

then was playing until like 11.45 then we went to the park nearby the playground. climbed onto there to sit. haha. we had our own candle light and drinks which was root bear mix with jack daniels which was 40 percent alcohol.

sparklers are super pretty. when it hit 12, we were just playing like crazy. took alot of pics. and like we polluted the air alot. haha. played for half an hour then sat there and talk. super fun. i guess it was relaxing talking to jiin and know for so long and it is easy to talk to her. yup.

was like talking about the future and stuff. alot of stuff that i normally won't talk to people about. i guess we are all filled with uncertainties and hopes for the future. first thing we said was like 'omg, i can't believe it is like 2009 already.'

talked until like 1.30 then i took cab back. it was quite near my house. whee.

thanks babe for spending the new year with me! could not think of a more perfect person except. . . nah, there isn't. haha. super meaningful today. i enjoyed it immensely. hearts. and HK HK! hopefully you don't kill me by then. hearts. spending the last day of the year with you could never been a more perfect way to end the year. yes! haha. yes yes. we will still meet up even if you have like 10 kids and are like the president of spore. the bestest best of friend i could ever have and i am like thanking god that fate us brought us together like in pri 5.

2008 just went past like that. it was a fun year especially towards the end. got to know more people. got to meet more people. new friendships, broke friendships. tons of happiness, some heartaches. it is probably like expected for the ups and downs. everything just went past in a blur. i really cannot remember what happened exactly except for a few events.

my new years resolution: not to fall in love this year. it is rather sad according to jiin. ha

i realised something while talking to jiin. i cannot recall a single sweet thing that was done to me. maybe there was too many. i am just afraid, that there is nothing at all.

p.s i love you ♥
living in my own crazy world