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When my love for you was blind
But I couldn't make you see it
Couldn't make you see it
That I loved you more than you'll ever know
A part of me died when I let you go

if you like to complain so much, go learn how earn some money by yourself.
and stop making it seem like you are the victim. it is pathetic.
it is funny how when you do things of your own mind, get into trouble and GET ANGRY.
oo, i love the irony. oh yeah. you are always always right.
kindly get out please.
oh and the reason i am not going is because i too don't want to see your face
and afraid of telling others what a lying skank you are.

p.s i love you ♥
living in my own crazy world

sueanne is feeling sleepy. like awfully sleepy.

had like only half an hour of lessons today at 3C. gave them back their papers and stuff and was like asking them to do their work and i took over the other half an hour from joli so had one hour with them. GOD THEY ARE NOISY.

i can't believe they are noisier than 3 grace. like gosh. like really noisy. i was like gosh. then i super nice pei miss toh until like until 1 plus before i left.

audrey brought her cam so we were just cam whoring in the staffroom and all pics are on facbook!

haha. dropped by j8 to withdraw money then ate curry puff before meeting miss usarin. hee. then took mrt down to p.s to meet yun and boon jin. walked around buying stuff then met mr joson chua.

watched 'he's just not into you'. it is a super sweet show. but girls shldn't watch it, cause they just get pissed and think guys suck. it is really all the truth about guys in general. for e.g , if a guy never calls you, HE WILL NEVER CALL YOU. just throw away his number. and if a guy really likes this girl, he will do anything to at least ask her out. which imo is true.

and the ending is quite sweet. like gosh. i love nice endings. reactions from the three girls (uu, yun, me) are typically gosh awww. joson kept saying 'tat girl is so dumb' and boon jin just kept getting whacked by me during the super super super sweet part.

melts. it is nice. not bad. then wanted to watch slum dog but no tickets at either gv or cathay so postpone to a tentative date which is next tues. went to mos to eat then joson left and the four of us loitered around plaza sing.

i am honestly bored of p.s it is like horror. esp after our chem a level papers, the same four of us like waited 5 hours just for some dim sum buffet at lao beijing. then wandered there like some . . . hobo.

and i am currently reading courses. reading on unis. and i dun believe their admissions results. like the min is like passes and some other stuff? noo. it is not true. finally found the one i was looking for and reality just sank in. law is like AAAA.

i am scared of next friday cause i am not expecting much. even i fear that my least of BBCCC is even better than what i will get. that is how unconfident i am. :(

"Gigi: Maybe he called me and I didn't get the message. Or maybe he lost my number, or was out of town, or was hit by a cab, or his grandma died

Alex: Or maybe he just didn't call because he has no interest in seeing you again"

p.s i love you ♥
living in my own crazy world

this is how sueanne spent her thursday working

walked into school at like 7am. then sat down and sat up laptop. went to see timetable. prepare stuff for lesson. walk into class at 8.30 to 9.00 for 3 C then went to 3G for 9.00 to 9.30. had break. went to 3F at 10 only to find that got teacher inside.

went back staff room to slack and surf net. then boon jin online. started chatting until like 12.20 while marking stuff. then went to sign out and quickly pack and went home at 12.35. reached home at 12.45pm.

it is a super boring day and i wa slike zzz. hopefully tomorrow timetable not pack or else will be super dead for outing.

watching 2 movies tomorrow with boon jin, usarin, joson, yiwen and yun. i hope i don't fall asleep hence the need to better timetable.

and later, hair treatment at 6.30. I AM SO GOING TO SLP. bleh.

p.s i love you ♥
living in my own crazy world

i am exhausted beyond belief.

didn't have lessons cause the LOVELY MISS ANG, took over my half an hour. hearts miss ang! miss ang is so sweet and gentle and nice. LOL.

after school was spent with miss ong AGAIN. and like accompany her while she went to cut her hair. lol. then went to eat tea. ice jelly. gosh. miss ong's honeydrew sago look as though had garlic on them. ha. and my lime juice was like LIME JUICE.

then it was just raining super heavily and stuff and i was like scared of lightning and thunder. bleh. then went home and got wet. T.T

was like lazing around cause i was really super tired. i think wednesdays are the worst and i was like drained. drained in a way which resulted me from not even going out. LOL.

tml tml.

and i was looking forward to driving on fri and guess wad? it got postponed to monday cause. . . my instructor has a student which has exam. zzz. wth.

i shall like slp tml then wake up to go treatment for hair. HAIS.

and i am like plain uneasy. the day draws nearer for like 060309 and i am going shit shit shit each time i have time to even think about it. which is alot. i can almost imagine the scene unfolding. and after that, swensens and alot alot of tissues and crying.

i must rmb to bring tissue, sunglasses and foundation or else i am screwed.

p.s i love you ♥
living in my own crazy world

currently now in school typing chinese stuff for wang lao shi cause i only have half an hour of lessons today which starts at 1. LAST PERIOD. grrr.

and gosh, i am soooo sleepy. and the image of that 99 roses is just forever imprinted on my mind which is kind of sad cause i don't even like roses tha much. i like lilies and carnations.

hais. listening to the 'point of no return' from phantom of the opera. i have no idea why i am just listening to it. it is like so super extreme song.

i want to sleep like so badly. T.T

p.s i love you ♥
living in my own crazy world

sueanne hearts waffles extremely much but sueanne hearts flo even more.

super happy today that i was able to meet up with my bestie like after so long. hee. and i was early too! or at least on time and she was late. ha.

then went to raffles city food court to eat. yummy. i was like starving cause i only had like toast in the morning. yummy. happy.

after that head down to gelare to eat waffles. btw, the ice lemon tea in gelare SUCKS. we took a sip and was like URGH. diluted. no taste. then we like went to tell the waitress and they changed it for us but there was like no diff in the taste. 2 BUCKS. ooo. waffles were good esp half priced.

then sat there talking. i super long never chat with flo. esp those kind of heart to heart stuff. and yay! i am still the one who knows her the best. smiles.

and i was stun for a while when i looked outsight. there was this girl. she wasn't even like walking with a guy. but she was like carrying this huge bouquet of roses which was so pretty and you can be for certain it was 99 red roses. hais. super sad.

so sat there until they chased us away. literally. then took mrt down to marina bay to take up. took alot of pics. happy. and like flo's advice to me was like 'never date a hc guy'. ok. she was more like against dating hc guys than jiin was. and i was quite like 'don't worry etc' anyway, promised her already.

whee. now at home and like not sleepy yet. or maybe i shld sleep sooner. can upload pics tomorrow.

on the side note, if you are not happy with the way things are now, JUST LEAVE. it is not like anyone is forcing you or what so ever. it is tiring to even PUT UP WITH YOU. yes. so disrupting our lives.

and i just had a super mortifying experience like this morning which caused me to be late for work and caused me to be embarrassed. like only people working with me and my two besties know about it. and seriously, I AM GOING TO SUE THE BUTTON COMPANY. god. how embarrassing.

tomorrow tomorrow. i hope i get nice classes which does not include 5g. gah.

p.s i love you ♥
living in my own crazy world

i shall go bathe. miss ong just left my house. haha. waffle!

gonna meet florence ho whom i haven SEEN FOR LIKE EONS. like lousy bestie. her, not me. smiles.

it is not like. it is just plain infatuation which i am kind of getting annoyed with. yet the other there is like 'proceed with caution' sign.

and i realised meiling's standard of drop dead gorgeous is equals to my standard of average =X this isn't good at all.

p.s i love you ♥
living in my own crazy world

this marks my 14ooth post.

ended lessons already and currently waiting for miss ong to finish her lessons so that i can go home and rest before heading out for my waffle date.

hais. i don't know how i managed to go through 2 hours of lesson with 1faith but it is a super cute class

and i genuinely hope that miss ong meiling don't end up as a paedophile. IT IS A CRIME. haha. i am so going to get killed for typing that out.

kate winslet won the oscars! haha. i am dying to watch revolutionary road. i think it will be a super romantic show.

phantom of the opera can never go wrong. the music is really very very nice.

and no one is going to occupy my thoughts for now.

p.s i love you ♥
living in my own crazy world

haha. back from tea with hearts.

finished lessons quite early. it was one of the quite slackiest days i had. like one hour of lesson and it was art hence i was like helping girls do rabbits stuff toys. so fun. haha.

after that, met mei at the amk mrt. then walked around taka to wait for daph and kl. met at paragon and being super fickle minded, i didn't want star bucks and ended up drinking starbucks. haha. hearts bagel.

sat there to chat and stealing daph from kl. ah. i am going to miss one of my super duper good frens of 6 years. DAPHNE TEH. must come back! after that, we went cine to look at shoes. haha. it was the same place which me and mei spent alot of time there.

then went arcade to play ddr. lol. need kaching. but fun but cause i was wearing heels, had to dance barefooted and it hurts.

haha. not really in a typing mood now hence short sweet and simple. took mrt home with them and huggx.

ah, meiling was like trying to get me to wake up cause i was still hung over. even miss ang siewmin could tell. haha.

finally miss ong like made me realise stuff. there is no point doing stuff if the other party just feels obligated to do so in return. no point. it just means it is all one sided. which is quite sad and disheartening. hence i will just stop it all.

and MISS ONG, don't be a paedo and don't like old man! ha. i bet with you alr. you don't go for bleh i don't go for bleh.

tomorrow finally meeting my bestie which i haven seen like over one month! hais. like since the hk trip!

now my head is clearer and i just know what i need to do. which is to dry my hair

i don't know what is so good about it. i really want to know but then something is holding me back. maybe because i don't mind something that is so mindless that i will feel that i wasted my time.

p.s i love you ♥
living in my own crazy world

today is tea with mei, daph and kl.
tomorrow is waffle with bf
thurs is perhaps dinner with usarin
friday is driving and maybe movie outing with clique
sunday is outing with pri 5/6 gang

funnily enough, i am dying to go zoo. hais. zoo zoo. i want to see snakes. T.T

p.s i love you ♥
living in my own crazy world

zomg. i feel so stupid now. it is like after getting drunk on something you finally woke up and you just feel so horrible after waking up.

i can't believe i was
1. delirious over something so minor
2. actually doing things that my heart says instead of my mind
3. talking rubbish to alot of people.

ok. the point 3 is like totally abit invalid since i always talk rubbish. bleh.

to those who chatted with me yest, PLEASE IGNORE WHATEVER I SAID. i can't even rmb what i typed now. i am quite like hopeless and zomg want to like take stuff i said back. hais.

maybe i should like just be a hermit for a while. hermit and disappear.

and i am totally trying to find this show 'timeless tales -the ugly duckling'. haha. it is some childhood thing which i suddenly want to watch. ah. i will totally like hearts the person who can get it for me. sigh. but quite hard to get though.

i am totally being unrealistic. yup. i was never confused i guess. i knew what i wanted all along. but i just can't get it. T.T

and miss toh is totally influencing me to get another piercing. SHE IS A DELINQUENT. ha.

and she keeps accusing me of being drunk today when i am totally sober. hais. aftereffects of yest.

p.s i love you ♥
living in my own crazy world

i find it extremely therapeutic to delete inbox. which was wad i did. 1873 worth of messages gone.

sometimes i wonder if i was really over it. or did i just lie to myself just to make myself feel totally better about it. the fact that i was smiling throughout the entire thing, i wonder if it says alot.

and gosh, work is starting tomorrow again. hais. i miss the random outings with s19, the cliques and my besties.

next week have alot of dates which makes sueanne a super happy girl. but going to be poor. meeting miss ong for tea tomorrow. happy. i am so going to start bitching.

i have alot of pics to upload.and i miss class outings and the funny things we all say T.T

and i feel so much better after chatting with jiin although she must think i am a total idiot now. ha

p.s i love you ♥
living in my own crazy world

i am totally not slpy at all now. due to having slept super long just now.

hais. thinking of stuff that i shouldn't be thinking. it is like just putting extra burden on my brain.

and jiin just totally stunned me by asking that question. i think my first reaction would be to cry.

p.s i love you ♥
living in my own crazy world

sueanne is a happy and satisfied girl. yup.

although i had a horrible time table yest which like had 3 hours straight of lessons but the classes were cute.

class outing was lovely and fun. miss my classmates and the times we hung out. like total had 8 ppl. went to the cathay at astons to eat. yummy. then sat there to catch up with stuff and hung out at ben and jerry's without like ordering anything.





then today. i want to like thank JOLI for like swapping timetables with me. haha. cause she had 1C and 1F which were my all time fave classes although they are super noisy. but she ended up having a longer timetable which was suppose to be mine. SORRY. will make it up to you.

but 1C and 1F were super cute. ah. then last min i had like 3G. all my familiar classes. so it was fun. then went home to slack.

brendan came to fetch me to amk hub cause he wanted to like buy stuff. HA. first time sitting my neighbour's car since he started driving. HE IS A VERY GOOD DRIVER. i am like reluctantly impressed.

went to miss clarity's cafe to makan at thompson and like ate apple strudel at ritz. and HE TREATED. ok. i have a super nice neighbour of 12 years. sat there chatting and it is super amusing. it is like having an older brother. haha.

then he fetched me home then went to pick up his gf.

now watching goong and doing alot of other stuff. but these past two days have been satisfying for me. like since monday. then daph and mei stayed over. ha. hope it will always be like that.

p.s i love you ♥
living in my own crazy world

不知从何时
你没有经过允许就闯进我心理
然后动摇了我
把深藏在内心的我给拉了出来
把深藏在心底的我给唤醒了
像是心脏出了问题一样
越来越想了解你
只要见不到你就会想你
就像傻瓜一样

p.s i love you ♥
living in my own crazy world

tralala. a good day. I DIDN'T HAVE LESSONS! heee.

and like mei and daph are going to slp over at my house then we will like go sch tgt tml. so nice.

gah. i have to like help wang lao shi type stuff. just cause i drew something and like went to show her and she was like are you free? and i was like . . . gah. end up typing alot of chinese stuff. cries. but at least i feel that my chinese isn't tat cmi.

and meiling is totally flirting with someone on her phone. although she fervently denies it.

and i finally cut my hair. although may seem like no diff but like it is much much better. and like cutting hair is super therapeutic. spent like 2 and a half hours at the saloon with my mum. and my black hair is growing out. cries. i shld like go do something about it asap.

and no, NO BLACK HAIR. STARES.

- - -

back from cycling. was like enjoying the wind. cycled to like bishan park 2 and in order to do that had to like cross the road. the first time ok, 2nd going back, nearly like stopped in the middle of the road. and guess what, i knocked into some stupid pillar in the park and the bike just fell on my leg.

yes, my left leg is a victim of like numerous abrasions whenever i start cycling.

on a side note, i tink hair looks like some sec sch girl's hair when tied up. hee. young young.

and i saw a dead cat on the side of the road. stares.

hearts my cycling partner. like random shouts for me to remain on the centre of the lane cause i have the tendency to like go to the grass. . .

p.s i love you ♥
living in my own crazy world

warning to future teachers wanna bes. especially females

if you want to be a super stylo teacher, you have to sacrifice one thing. your legs. cause no outfit is perfect without nice shoes.

that is what happened to me. my legs were dying today. new shoes and it was like heels and i was just going f f f with each step.

i had a two hour lesson with 5 purity. super cute class. enthu also. and i think they were just watching me walk painfully.

please choose comfort over style. i am going to just wear flats tomorrow and try heels on wed. provided my feet does not hurt. my last toe on both feet was like being poked and prodded.

gah. and miss ong found it super amusing.

and oh yeah, miss ang baked durian cake and miss toh brought cheese cake. YUMMY. haha. i hearts cake. esp cheese.

p.s i love you ♥
living in my own crazy world

chatting with my bestie jiin online now. ah. a level results are freaking me out honestly. and it is just something in my mind that can't be removed.

and i want some havoc in my life. like i want someone to just make my life more exciting. break more rules. unrestricted. late nights without having to worry. heart to heart talks in like parks.

i want spontaneous fun. i don't want something that is planned. i want things that can go 'ok, lets go out now' in like 8pm and stuff. or random meet ups. i want to sit somewhere quiet and just listen to the night sounds. to be able to sit with someone and enjoy the silence.

relationships with no strings attached are called flings. it will be fun to have one now and then. but i dun tink i can bear the emotions that come along with it.

i want random smiles that can make my heart skip unknowingly. random words to make me smile.

funny, i just told jiin that i wanted something serious. i wonder how true are my words.

i had that before. and now i am missing it. the random spontaneous of it all. the late nights. the stars.

i wonder if i can find someone that can do all that with me.

p.s i love you ♥
living in my own crazy world

haha. today's vday was one of the best i had spent so far.

i love you miss ong mei ling! hearts. shall post pics later.

was watching titanic on tv just now. how ironic. on vday show a tragic love story.

Rose: I love you, Jack.
Jack: Don't you do that, don't say your good-byes.
Rose: I'm so cold.
Jack: Listen, Rose. You're gonna get out of here, you're gonna go on and make lots of babies, and you're gonna watch them grow. You're gonna die an old... an old lady warm in her bed, but not here, not this night. Not like this, do you understand me?
Rose: I can't feel my body.
Jack: Winning that ticket, Rose, was the best thing that ever happened to me... it brought me to you. And I'm thankful for that, Rose. I'm thankful. You must do me this honor, Rose. Promise me you'll survive. That you won't give up, no matter what happens, no matter how hopeless. Promise me now, Rose, and never let go of that promise.
Rose: I promise.
Jack: Never let go.
Rose: I'll never let go. I'll never let go, Jack.

p.s i love you ♥
living in my own crazy world

finally done with pics! hee.

p.s i love you ♥
living in my own crazy world

40 random facts

1. i wonder if i am a paedophile after being a relief teacher
2. i supposedly am a closet delinquent according to some people
3. russia history intrigues me more than china history ever will.
4. i aspire to be a chef but ends up poisoning myself more than once
5. i think that alcohol tastes like wood. e.g wine, vodka, champagne etc
6. i can't sleep with light on or with noise. extremely light sleeper
7. i am truly fascinated with nail art designs and hairdos
8. i think about the weirdest and the most impossible things. mind in gutter
9. once i am fascinated with a piano score, i will play it like everyday until i get totally sick of it.
10. i love clarke quay and think it is like the most romantic place in spore
11. i worry about the future like almost everyday. even 10 years into the future can freak me out
12. i finally learn how to cycle like the day before i turn 19
13. once betrayed, i don't trust easily again
14. i actually enjoy marking work but hate it when answers are not provided
15. i truly wish to tour the world. esp spain and italy
16. i like sitting down in quiet places with people i like and love
17. i sometimes wish i would be around when the world ends
18. i dislike one sided convos especially when i am not the one to initiate the convo
19. i maybe too addicted the com and tv at times but more faithful to my bed
20. i rather have notes and handmade stuff than things that are bought
21. books have made my expectations of the opposite gender rather unrealistic
22. i think jc may have killed whatever love i had for studying
23. i think my heart is too stubborn for my own good
24. i dislike receiving flowers cause i think it is sad when they die
25. i would rather be studying than working ANY TIME.
26. i used to wish that whatever happened in storybooks would happen to me.
27. when i grow older, i want to open a cafe that sells nothing but hot chocolate
28. if i was born in the 1900s, i would think clark gable was the most handsome man alive
29. i prefer historical fiction to modern fiction
30. i hate horror movies cause i won't watch the entire thing
31. i can probably write a more romantic proposal than any other guy out there
32. i wish i can see fireworks everyday if not for the pollution
33. my most ideal height was 1.7m
34. i love all secondary colours, green, orange, purple
35. i love nights to days, and i love rainy to sunny days
36. my favourite quote was 'frankly my dear, i don't give a damn' from gone with the wind
37. i think chivalry is more important than looks in a guy
38. i love shows about romance and comedy than gore and horror
39. i hate macdonalds the most.
40. guys with sideway smiles can make my heart skip. clark gable!

p.s i love you ♥
living in my own crazy world

on an extremely random note, i feel like getting a fifth piercing on like one of my ears. not helix though.

and on another extremely random note, although i don't regret like my piercings, i think it will hurt. the fifth one.

it was only this year that i realise which frens will stay with me like forever and which will not. i guess it was like two weeks ago when i finally got tired of being the initiating convos. initiating smses. then i stopped. funnily enough, some people take it for granted that i will be willing to like be there forever. no. i am not that type.

technically, being too busy is not an excuse. or at least, not one that i will accept.

p.s i love you ♥
living in my own crazy world

i totally blame vday for like whatever nostalgia and whatever sadness the people around me are feeling. like wanting memories back or wanting something to happen.

all i can say is like, step out of that train of thought and look further.

today was such a slack day. like only had 45 min of lessons then entire day was just waiting for time to pass. left school at like 12.30 and reached home bathed and started watching tv. ALADDIN. i love disney cartoons.

yesterday was such a fun day. i had lessons but it wasn't as bad as i thought it would be. after school was just FUN. hearts.

after school, met mei at like amk hub to wait for daph so we were shopping around there. spent like half an hour in a shoe shop trying on shoes. i currently have this shoe fetish which i totally blame siew min cause her shoes are all so pretty.

so anyway, bought this pretty shoes but i think. . . it is like about two and a half inches high. like platforms. i seriously don't think any guy will go out with me if i were to wear those shoes. ha. i will be like at least 170 cm. at least. mei also bought.

then daph came and we went to subway to makan. haha. cold cut trio is nice! first time i try but it is nice! sat there talking until like 3-4 plus. gosh. they are super supporting friends and i really really love them both. like two of the few sngs sec girls that i am really close with. and yes, they encourage me to play.

after that travelled down to like orchard. went to far east. shop! i was looking for flats and mei was just looking for shoes while daph browse. i think we walked into every single shoe shop in far east and most clothing places. i really liked one necklace. it was a bird in a cage. pretty.

shopped until my feet was like dying. ha. we shopped until like 7 plus then went to wisma to like queue for ding tai fung. yummy. was like taking pics. and eating nice food.

then daph went home and mei and i continued shopping. we walked to like cine and there was like tinker toes there! shoes. super cheap shoes! mei bought like 3 pairs yest and i bought like two. she bought alot of other stuff. ha.

around like 9 plus, we went to the dessert story in heeren where i ate mango snow and she ate almond pudding. just sat there talking about life and other stuff. relationships. hais. it is comforting to know that your friends are willing to listen and stuff.

took mrt with her after that then went home. will upload pics on facebook and here if i am not too lazy.

their advice: "play but don't fall in."

i will listen cause really, there is nothing to lose.

“Each player must accept the cards life deals him or her: but once they are in hand, he or she alone must decide how to play the cards in order to win the game.”"

p.s i love you ♥
living in my own crazy world

evidence that at night, i can't slp.

for the past two days like after bathing when i come back from school. i just crash on my parent's bed and fall asleep until like 6 plus. yup. like around 3, 4 to 6 plus. wake up feeling that i haven slept at all and feeling woozy.

vday is coming. ha. meiling!!! ok. i blatantly hinted that i wanted a flower. but then obviously not from her seeing that she is like a girl. and ha, i wonder who knows what is my favourite flower. hint, it is not rose.

when walking home with mei, was talking about stuff. one of it was about our sec 2 history teacher. she wasn't very short but she was very opinionated. she was telling us that like in the future if we were to have bfs and stuff, shld date someone who is working. it was like a hint to us that that time when we were 14, we shldn't be indulging in those relationships that were only for play.

it made sense and seriously until now, i can still rmb what she said. why bother dating someone who is still living off his parents. all the money is not even his. if he is not working, who is paying for all the dates? his parents. might as well date his parents.

ha. it never worked well for me when people treat using their parents' money. or technically, i don't feel very good when people start treating me. maybe because i think that i am fully able to pay for myself.

and for girls who let their bfs pay for everything. GROW A BACKBONE. he is not an atm machine. and for bfs who let their gfs pay for everything. they shldn't even be born as guys. CHIVALRY.

shall go run to watch the nanny.

p.s the time traveller's wife is just sweet.

p.s i love you ♥
living in my own crazy world

ooo. my pay came in. or technically the letter for govt service and i hate cpf. like to the max of the max of the max. it is like killing my life. gah.

and if not for the hk trip and cny, i would prob earn much much more. like now it is like for jan it is 629 dollars but considering i only worked for 11.50 days in the entire month of jan. HA. and my total gross is supposedly 747.50. YES. cpf ruined my life. like BLEH.

now calculating how much i will technically earn in like. . . feb?

today was nice. i had no lessons or rather siew min and mei were nice enuff to take over my one hour lesson while i marked books. it is like mountains. i wish to clear the english stuff for primary 1 like finally so that i can say bye bye to them and like never ever have to like touch them. but i miss my classes.

ha. miss ong walked me to school today. hee. cause her dad fetched her too early so she went to my house and like walked up tgt to sch. lunch with daph and mei! hee. i miss daph also! tml is outing outing. mei also walked me down. ha. hearts you!

was talking to them about stuff. seriously, it is much easier to talk to st nicks girls about problems cause like, they understand. secondly, they can actually give you solid advice. and being in an all girls school, you don't really have to worry about what you say. ALL ARE GIRLS.

shall go like bathe and probably slp or something. i need kaching. i want to earn like 10 K by this year. and by teaching alone, it is not enough. sadly so.

and i am tired of people asking me if i am dating etc. or if i am attached. for once and for all. i am not attached. dating. . . i am not even sure about that. and if anyone likes me, i wouldn't know cause it is called AN LIAN for a reason. and if i like anyone now, the answer is currently no. found out that liking someone totally kills the entire dating scene etc.

i am totally addicted to one song.

'Wish I could shut my playboy mouth, oh oh oh-oh
How'd I turn my shirt inside out? Inside outright
Control your poison babe, roses have thorns they say
And we're all getting hosed tonight, oh oh oh-oh'

p.s i love you ♥
living in my own crazy world

they shld put warning signs on guys.

i never felt so STUPID in my entire life. like gosh. really dumb. i never ever want to feel this way again. if other ppl know, they will get stun. it is really. . . got lead by a string?

ok. this is really ANNOYING ME.

p.s i love you ♥
living in my own crazy world

ok. work was like. . . quite zzz. had two primary 5 classes and like. i hated 5 grace. at least the half which i didn't like was not in class due to chinese. ha.

primary 1s are cute. i miss my classes.

had dinner with kx. was like slping when he called and woke me up and resulted in me being groggy during the entire dinner. hais.

watching friends now and reading book later. i need to do stuff. hais.

i dunno wad i wanna do now. and YES, provided i dun get stood up, i have a date on vday. MISS ONG MEILING! dun you dare ps me like last year like that.

and vday is overrated. everything is so ex.

p.s i love you ♥
living in my own crazy world

ok. first things first. i miss my juniors!
my son patrick and my daughters li chen and elyena! like super miss them and like feeling all happy today.

i can't rmb my dreams again. it got me irritated yest. i know the dreams were impt. but i can't can't rmb. i only can see fragments in my mind. they are all blurred. and it just made me restless.

today was like first time in three weeks i didn't have to like walk into a primary 1 class to teach english. i miss it. funny. but i do. i guess only when you truly lose something then you will realise how much it meant to you.

i had like two primary 4 classes and one primary 5 class. it was fun but it was really stoning in class and waiting for time to pass. hence unsatisfactory. i rather teach. i can't believe i am saying that. it is interesting when girls come up to me and like ask about what i do and about life stuff. it is fun. and it was like BLEH, when my 4g class came and asked me if i had a bf. that qn, i dunno how to answer. the answer is dunno.

then my feet was like dying. wore new shoes and like, dying feet. and the moment i walked into my 4g class. the first thing i said to them was that, my feet was dying. yup.

after school. i wonder what i did. oh yeah. went to meet kx for lunch at like adam food centre. and since i travelled from amk all the way there, I WAS NOT LATE. he was. nasi lemak! and potato! happy. like gosh. and he totally spoilt my lime juice. he had some weird drink with all the fruits mixed and it only tasted of bananas and he had to just put some in my lime juice. which tasted all banana after that. BLEH.

then we went to nj cos he wanted to imposter and go borrow photocopying machine. haha. it is cheap. like 3 cents per copy. after that, went canteen cause i wanted to find my juniors. then kx left for work and i went to find lichen and xinyi!

whee. i miss them la. then elyena came and then my son came. i miss them. met new juniors. got gladys and another one which i dunno wad is his name. I SAW ANDREW! ha. it was like YES. super happy cause i was feeling rather out of place since i was like j3 alr.

after that went co room and like hang out. ha. saw alot of j2s now. my juniors. elvin was also there. ha. was like super high when i was there. i miss schooling life like badly. i miss being able to misbehave instead of having to contain becaues you are sort of like a grown up alr.

had sectionals. was sitting listening to my juniors and stuff. i played cello like. . . haha. twinkle twinkle little star cause all the previous scores were gone and i totally suck at memorising songs. bleh. ha.

after that went lt 5 and hanged outside the co room. had pizza for dinner. took pics with my juniors. hearts. it just made me happy. reached home around then like drank soup.

alot of things are on my mind now. it is like. i dunno wad to choose. i dunno where to go from there. shld i stop or go? i mean like haven i learnt my lesson enough? gah. alot of things just running thru my head now. like alot.

p.s i love you ♥
living in my own crazy world

after the past incidences. i promised myself that i wouldn't be that dumb. wouldn't just go head on with it.

and never hand over that easily. at least it finished before it started. i won't be that fool again.

p.s i love you ♥
living in my own crazy world

gosh. i never knew people were such hypocrites. like seriously big hypocrites.
how could you advise me one thing and then towards another another.
and keep badmouthing each other. like wth.
thank god because of work, i won't have to see you.
cause i would not know what to think anymore.

p.s i love you ♥
living in my own crazy world

do you know what is meaningless?
i guess i am just so bored with everything alr.

p.s i love you ♥
living in my own crazy world

i just had a very bad night of sleep. god. i just feel so emotionally and mentally exhausted now.

last night alr around 10 plus, my head was fuzzy and like my eyes were closing. i had no idea who i was chatting with or what i was doing alr.

watched movie with jiin yest. the curious case of benjamin button. it was gooood. ok, added bonus was brad pitt. and your heart just skips a beat when he gets younger. seriously, a young brad pitt was zomg good looking. even when he was in his 30s - 40s. he was like HOOTTT. and he took his shirt off alot.

settled the pdl thing. i need to like choose if private or like at ssdc for school. i am so taking auto. like YES. i need to like finish it by 6 months the driving. settle my ftt before uni and like do alot of other stuff. was talking to jiin about uni choices. i sort of chosen what i wanted but i am wavering. if i can like run overseas i think i would for the experience. but need results. to be honest, i am a little freaked out. if thoughts keep running through my head, it just won't stop.

i need an outing. i need stars in the sky and i need swings in the playground. and there used to be someone that was very accommodating to go out with me. the only thing is, that baka is in ns. gah. MR TAN JUN WEI! can you like awol from ns?!

and i need to stop thinking. OK. stop.

and i find it damn sweet that my frens are super concern over me esp when they read my blog and they find that it is unusual. THANKS DAPHNE! hearts.

p.s i love you ♥
living in my own crazy world

vexed. just plain vexed. i wondering if i am like pmsing majorly today but i just feel so SIAN.

rawr. and there is a thing to celebrate. after like one year plus. it is finally over. the feeling is gone. so like THANK GOD. finally.

ha. can move on and happy. cause seriously, i think it wasted my time, my brain space and most of all my emotions and feelings.

you know why? cause i found out some ugly things. that i really wish i didn't know =X

on the side note, i think unshaven guys are hot. that is if they can pull off that look without looking like some. . . ha.

p.s i love you ♥
living in my own crazy world

exhausted. extremely.

shall fall on the bed and sleep. i feel like quitting my current job which is to relief teach at st nicks. really sudden. but it is just soooo, UNFULFILLING. ok, you go into the class, you teach, you mark work, you return. it goes just one big round.

and kids are fking annoying. bloody annoying. like god. i had to make five girls stand up in 1C. i feel like just throwing that class away and teach 1F. really. next week, i dun even want to step into that class anymore. ANYMORE. no. i dun want one month of lessons.

wanting a part time job badly. extra kaching and i just want to do something meaning. TEACHING IS NOT.

my dad just left for shanghai. going to feel lonely. my mum is leaving for jakarta. i am going to be lonelier. shall throw myself into working.

p.s i love you ♥
living in my own crazy world

ready to surrender collapse on my bed and sleep and seriously, i am tired. TIRED.

tired of marking books, of teaching. i am so cursing that teacher that was on mc. i got like dozen and one complains from parents who were like asking when was she coming back. and got a ridiculous email from one of the parent complaining that the daughter didn't bring back her list for spelling and the spelling was yesterday. HELLO?! is it MY PROBLEM? seriously, like keep telling the class have spelling and if they forget, they can seriously go and like bang wall. and fyi, her daughter scored full marks. complain again?

yest i was pissed. this girl was totally crying cause she didn't want to go daycare. wanted to go grandma's house. i had to like walk with her to the other end of the school. listen to her cry for 15 minutes outside the school bus and she didn't want to get on. wth. today, she was crying again. i totally yelled at her and scolded in front of some parents. HAIS. heck.

parents are overly paranoid. i feel like just telling some off. LIKE HELLO? your generation you think so lucky ah.

shall go and bathe asap. i am like very very sleepy. and tired. and tml i have lesson. WTH.

p.s i love you ♥
living in my own crazy world

haha. was super happy yest. was like a bundle of nerves and stuff but ended up extremely happy.

NADAL WON THE AUSTRALIAN OPEN 2009.



it is like a super super happy thing for me. probably the best that happened in 2009. YES. haha. it just made me super happy. i didn't even dare watch until like the 5th set. was looking at the online tracker and was going oh shit and praying. happy.

ah. sorry to all those that chatted with me yest cause i probably spoke rubbish and like didn't make any sense at all. YESSS. happy is sueanne.

today's school was . . . ok? was super unhappy that i was posted to 1C for english alr. how irresponsible is that english teacher? like hello? i totally love 1F now instead of 1C cause they are easier to manage and the girls there are less manipulative and spoilt.

gah. was damn pissed off at one point. like one of the admin staff told me say one parent went to sort of complain that i couldn't handle 1C cause they were very noisy. HELLO? UR KIDS ARE SPOILT AND RUN ALL OVER THE PLACE LIKE SOME HYPERACTIVE SUGAR HIGH PERSON. gah. i dun see why 1F was ok and 1C was not. ha. but anyway, shall be like damn fierce to 1C tml. seriously, letting them climb all over me. 1F is sort of scared of me at times cause i made one girl stand during my period. 1C. . . i wonder what shall i do tml with them. HA. they totally deserve it if i tell them off.

but it is annoying, i told them off like twice last week. grrr.

had a super nice steamboat dinner with family just now. hearts. happy. tml i have a long break. PLEASE DO NOT SLOT IN ANY CLASSES. i have to mark their corrections and spellings. X(

p.s i love you ♥
living in my own crazy world

i am sorry you are such a failure as a human.
and to be honest, you can bitch all you want.
have you ever wondered why there is unfairness?
well, the poison letter started it. then the theft case.
sure i have done things wrong in the past.
since you are such a angel, what did you do that was NOT WRONG?
no wonder guys like you. no wonder. i was wondering.
now the answer came out

p.s i love you ♥
living in my own crazy world

random spam of pics since hk trip, the clarke quay outing on fri, my birthday, daph's birthday and so on. XD and the first pic is cause i kind of miss my kfc buddy who is like awol in ns. tsk.

p.s i love you ♥
living in my own crazy world

i realised i am totally unsympathetic towards ppl who screwed up their own lives. it is like, you are the one who made that choice, so live with it.

like this week, i had a primary 1 girl, lets call her K who asked me if she could go toilet. and i was like ok you can go and continued teaching the rest of the class. she disappeared for like 20 minutes. then another one of my girls went to tell me that K fell down like the second step of the stairs and was crying.

so like my 1C girls are technically super kpo, like some ran out go fetch her and apparently they were so enthu about it then K fell in front of the class AGAIN. so she was like crying and bawling away. and i got annoyed. super annoyed.

i didn't really try to comfort her and just ask her to like hold tissue to her gum cause she cut it and it was bleeding abit. so anyway, i was like telling the class if they said they were to go toilet and end up running everywhere and get hurt, who is to be blamed. the class was like ourselves which made me quite pleased to know that at least the future generation is not that screwed up as most people think.

i mean come on, K was like always running around looking into other people's classes and like even my 3G class has told me that. and from her class to the toilet there is no stairs required to climb. hence she was running around.

and hence i got annoyed with her cause she was bloody useless. i had to carry her bag along with my laptop and my pencil case and like 3 stacks of worksheet all the way to like the other end of her school to meet her grandfather who was fetching her home. guess wad, not even a word of thanks. wow.

teaching can be fun, mixing around with kids is fun. but life isn't all about games. there are times that you can't hide behind your age anymore and pretend to be ignorant or think that people will still back you up because of certain relations. no. humans are selfish. there are no such things as saints.

true that you can't make everyone happy. but throwing all your eggs into one basket is going to land you up with nothing.

p.s i love you ♥
living in my own crazy world